Update

These last two weeks were a roller coaster of events and it has definitely tested my patience and as well helped me realize how functional the church is back home. People actually do their job and dont whine about it. 

   With something a little different than normal missionary work. Beus has a date. Like not really but he does at the same time. We over with a recent convert and they asked us what our taste in women were back home. I havent really thought about it in a while but my comps, Beus and Greer, bring it up as a frequent topic, and Beus, likes latinas. So Greer decides to chuck him under the bus and say "Beus Loves latinas! He wants to marry one and have his mother in law beat his kids with a chancla!" None of that is a lie but the fact he said it out loud kinda made us jump a little. Then without hesitation the Member says "Ive got someone I can call hold up." So he CALLS his friend and after talking for a little bit says to come by on thursday because they'll make some food and she will come over. So as a joke we agree. Turns out. Home bro doesnt understand sarcasm. So we "unfortunately" planned a meeting for the same time. Sheesh. But how many people say they had a "date" on their mission. Boos can.

   Let me rewind a little bit to the intro of this email. I'm thankful for functional wards. People who love their callings and make the world a better place. Guess what. Our Bishop doesn't like any of that. He loves problems. He is not about making things work. He wants it done the way he thinks it should be. AND ITS ALL FETCHING APOSTATE. This brigham. We'll start at the very beginning. When I was in this zone last I was in the Spanish ward, even when I was in the spanish ward this dude was giving us crap about NoT sChEdUlInG iN tHe WaRd CaLeNdAr. WELL GUESS WHAT JUAN! YOU NEVER GAVE US SQUAT! So he then starts dogging on how we arent good missionaries and that we arent trustworthy. My brigham it was a baptism of 5 people youre dogging on. WHILE WE WERE CLEANING UP THE MESS. Even in the spanish ward he was the opp. But now guess what. Im in his ward now. And he is spitting out crap faster than he can chew it. We had 2 friends who were planning on getting baptized and we ask him if we can do the baptism and confirmation on sunday because their kid is in the hospital and they cant leave til late saturday. He then tells us that if we baptize them he wont confirm til the next week. Which doesnt sound too bad until you realize satan will be doing everything to shut them down from receiving this gift. He then proceeds to go off and tell us how it is our fault that other Recent Converts are inactive and how he doesnt want it to happen again. (Which sounds reasonable but when he has a smug "gotcha" face and is laughing at you the whole time it makes you want to put his teeth into his throat). He continues saying how he has the keys for confirmation and and how he wont let it happen. How our president is just pushing us so we can look better at mission meetings. At this point I am fuming. I aint taking squat from Juan Perfecto Martinez anymore. So I start Ripping out standards showing that he cant say anything about recent convert baptisms and how he cant do anything to stop us and you have no authority or priesthood keys over the people we teach. And all of the inactive people? Youre fault. You do the ministering and you make sure they have a place. I dont remember seeing you at brother Rodriquez's house when it burned down. None of the recent converts even know youre name. So we made a fat call to the president and we tell him everything. President started out sympathetic and saying well maybe he had a rough week, then as we continued he started to get mad and he cuts off and just says "I'm going to call stake president Guzman" then he hangs up and we dont hear from him for the rest of the night. Fast forward to the next day president only texts us 2 things. A screenshot of the handbook saying he has mo authority and then says "I authorize you to baptize and confirm your friends tomorrow." Checkmate. Or so we thought. We go to the church to set up for the baptism and JUAN LOCKS THE FETCHING BAPTISMAL SUITS. I am pissed. He knows we won so he is just being petty. And let me tell you, never have I felt the spirit breaking something. I broke the U-Bolt off the door and grabbed those suits because this dude a bum. We do the Baptism. We confirm them. We win. I go back. Fold the suits on his desk and put the shattered lock on top. Now its Checkmate, you suck Juan. I would deck you in the face with my truck if that meant our friends can recieve eternal life. Later in interviews with president he told us that he is going to he released as bishop. Mic drop. But now that I'm done fuming I can continue on the week. 

   We Had a meeting with all of the Zone Leaders again. And the fire alarm went off. Womp womp. But its nice to see old friends over there. 5 out of 9 of the people I came out with in the mission are in High Leadership assignments. Im the only guy of the 5 Elders with high Leadership and all the Sisters just take turns being STL's in this mission   We've been working on helping everyone enjoy missionary work while still being effective so we introduce "side quests". Go find some new people and go play some games with them. Or just go take some dirt roads (Im a huge fan of ripping our Nissan Rogue at its limit through the Irrigation canal) Its not an actual invitation but were just trying to help everyone not be depressed. but we've been taking some gnarly pictures at abandoned houses our just hooning around. I would feel bad about it except for we are doing so much better than the rest of the district and we have also baptized 5 people this transfer. You can Enjoy the Mission and have fun at the same time.

    My Mom sent me a package with some Magic the Gathering Deck Boxes so ive been painting those and making them all look so pretty. And Ian sent a couple of cards and they are honestly some of the coolest cards ive seen. They're all like western style wanted posters and they all have some cool abilities with them as well. So shouts out my Mom and shouts out Ian for hooking me up.

    Also the most amount of tigers in the world is in the homes of Texas. The second most is the wild of Texas.

Anyways I love y'all